2011

January

January began with unemployment, a 2nd birthday and ended with an amazing job offer and the promise of staying in Utah

February
February began with Mark's new job at IM Flash

and ended with great loss.

March
March began with a funeral

and ended with a new house.

April
April came with some smiles

and kite flying

and best BYU buddies

and a 8th year anniversary.

May
May came with a 30th birthday!

some tulips

Mother's Day

a fourth birthday

a first bithday

and a trip to Park City.

June
June came with a haircut

Father's Day

and a Princess Festival.

July
July celebrated our Nation's birthday

began the traditional picnic Sunday dinner up Provo Canyon

and an awesome trip to Yellowstone.

August
August saw lots of trips to Farm Country

a birthday

splash pads

a visit to see Daddy's work

and a train ride.

September
September brought us our first preschooler

the back and forth daily debate over buying Sean a kitty when he fell in love with this one.

an emergency sleepover in Eagle Mountain when Daddy hit the gas line and almost blew up the house....

and finally sprinklers!!!!

October
October trip to the Zoo

jack-o-laterns

Toy Story Trick or Treaters

and an autism diagnosis.

November
November came with gratitude for three angels

Sean's first day of autism preschool

and lots of love.

December
December brought an anniversary

MAGIC

the true meaning

and family.

2011 proved to be the most challenging year of our family. This year brought with it pain, sadness, loss, denial, stress, anxiety, change, tears, confusion, weight gain, anger, and every other emotion. At times I felt like our family was just trying to survive our trials and make it through each day. As each new trial arrived I wondered how and where I would find strength to handle more pain. I am grateful for so many people who have fervently prayed for our family. When my strength was gone, I am certain that strength and courage came from the faith of others. I am grateful that we get to live in Utah surrounded and supported by family.

2011 was also a year of growth. We experienced healing, kindness, support and unconditional love. We discovered that we really can do hard things. Heavenly Father still loves me even when I am angry with him. Our Savior's atonement is real and has the power to heal all wounds. I understand the importance of having the presence of the Holy Ghost always. His influence can calm a racing heart and help bring perspective to a hopeless circumstance.

I am most grateful to see the end of 2011. I can not believe that the new year will be easy or trouble free. I hope to have strength enough to endure whatever is coming next. My theme for the new year is found in the scripture: 2nd Nephi 31:20 "Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."

Hope! I will have hope that our lives may be filled with peace and joy through our Savior's healing power. I will have hope that I can make it through the year anniversary of Kara's passing without falling apart and reliving the nightmare. I will have hope that autism won't define Sean and that he will progress and be happy. I will have hope in my journey as a mother. I can hope for good things to come instead of fearing the next tragedy. I can be optimistic and hopeful for a positive, calm, peaceful year.